It’s alive!

Well, another tiring week draws to a successful end, and this was, by far, one of the most stressful days ever. Glad to say that something I’ve been bashing at for weeks now has finally worked… ah, what a feeling, the thrill of discovery…

Okay, once more, I don’t have antything deep prepared to write, and I’m really sorry. But, as I said in my last entry, these days have knocked the wind out of me, and I’m still not done. And, even more surprising, these past days (and especially today) I’ve caught myself reverting to some old working habits I developed in the army… yes, you CAN develop things in the army. You know what they say: You never really quit, ha ha.

I think I just need a break to clear my head. I mean, just look at this entry.

Nothing from nothing

Hello ye all,

I’m just putting this entry out there to let you know that, although there’s a lot on my mind these days, none of it can really go into a blog… it’s a combination of tiredness and one of those times in your life where you just have to get your head sorted out, burn what doesn’t matter and keep going. And I’m still doing triage.

Wow. That was easier in writing…

I look forward to getting back.

The Jobseeker’s chant

Here’s a little update on how the job chasing thing is going:

…did you see anything? No? Neither did I.

Okay, okay, so it hasn’t moved an inch since the last time… I’ve been so caught up with all my lab work that I really haven’t got much energy for the challenges of finding a job that will start in ten months at the earliest.

There. I said it. Shoot me.

I’ll tell you though, and I’m sure all of you out there doing PhDs will agree: When they tell you it takes three years of your life, they mean it takes three years OUT of your life. And when you start, you’re too grateful and hopeful and dazzled to realise that little word that’s missing…

No, ladies and gentlemen, let’s get this straightened once and for all: A PhD doesn’t mean that the world is your oyster (I prefer crab myself). It doesn’t mean that you will have fifty employers falling over themselves to hire you, and it doesn’t mean that your life is sorted. In fact, if anyone out there can claim to have his life sorted, I’d like to meet him.

Nope – it’s back to the classifieds and “I believe that I would be suited to this position in terms of productively contributing to your company” and the “I have had ample time to understand myself and assess my strengths and weeknesses. Strengths? Well, I am hard-working, enthusiastic about my projects, disciplined, focused and very much a peoples’ person. Also, I can function effectively under pressure while maintaining both my goals and my co-workers in sight. Weeknesses? I guess… [fake sheepish smile] I am sometimes a little too focused on my work, you know, a little bit of a perfectionist – I suppose I am quite demanding of myself, and that might interfere with other aspects of my life such as my social interactions… [widen sheepish smile and look innocent].

Sounds familiar? Just memorise that poem and don’t forget to brush your teeth. The rest, as W.S. said, is silence.

Once you get the job, all that can go out the window.

The Da Applicant Code

Today I began officially to look for a job, for after I finish my PhD sometime in October…

It’s a hard pitch so far, what with all the requirements some of these positions have: “The applicant must be an enthusiastic scientist [check], preferably with a background in [insert complicated name of scientific field] and good references [check]. The applicant must also be a researcher of international stature, must have piles of publications in top journals, must be at least a Nobel candidate and must have attempted world domination at least once. Applicants of divine lineage with their own cults will be highly favoured. Miraculous powers a must.”

You’d think that, at this stage, this would be easier. In fact, it was easier to find a job back in the day when all I had going for me was my high-school certificate and a healthy back.

But I shouldn’t complain – yet. Like I said, I just started looking, and God has an amazing way of directing these things in my life. It’s about trust, not CVs… which reminds me, however, that I should continue updating mine. You ever seen an “academic” CV? It runs a few tomes long, with an absurd amount of detailing of every breath you’ve taken in your life…

And of course, at this point, I must rue as I always have:

I should’ve taken gardening.

Stat rosa pristina nomine…

Yesterday I watched The name of the Rose. I’d forgotten what an amazing story it is, both in book and film.

If you haven’t read it, you should. It’s a detailed, intriguing thriller set in 1327, about a series of gruesome murders in a Benedictine monastery, and the Sherlock Holmes-esque efforts of an English Franciscan monk to solve the case before the Inquisition takes over and starts burning random people.

The historical detail is dazzling, as would be expected from a scholar like Umberto Eco (the author, by the way), and I doubt there are any modern writers who could match it for plot, character development, intricacy, storyline, description, setting and suspense. And that’s including JK “I made millions with bedtime stories” Rowling.

But what really hit me this time was the concerns that the theologians of the time had. Even to someone who knows nothing about Church history, this period will appear pretty much as it was: Insane.

It was a time when over three quarters of Europe lived in squalid poverty, while many who professed to be men of God sat in golden thrones, growing fat on the taxes of the ignorant masses who hoped to gain access into heaven by donating what little they had to the Church. It was a time when the Christian faith had become so infiltrated by traditions and politics and bad blood, that it resembled nothing of what it should be. And every now and again, someone would speak openly against the injustice of the Church and the rich and before you knew it, you had massive uprisings, revolutions, the poor slaughtering the rich and the rich slaughtering the poor.

In fact, it was a mess. Crime, disease, depravity, corruption and those who should be helping just made things worse. Lack of education was punished as a crime; higher education was punished as heresy. Mental disorders were treated as demonic posession; sickness as witchcraft; poverty as God’s judgement.

(Of course, these things don’t happen anymore. The world is so much better now.)

And in the midst of all this raged fierce arguments of minute and obscure theological issues that seem all the more idiotic in hindsight. Not that they were all insiginificant. Not that there were no examples to follow. Not that we shouldn’t be thankful for the Wise of the time who battled to keep what they could from deteriorating into chaos. But for the biggest part, I believe that what called itself the Church back then was nowhere near worthy of the title, both in terms of theology and of practice.

Ok ok, stop yawning. I just thought I’d up the culture factor a little. Not only because I’m so fascinated by that particular era, but because it is a sad fact that the blindness and stupidity that plagued the world back then is still here today.

A hippy scientist I worked with asked me once: “[Dude] Why do you waste your time with the things of the past?” And I said, “Because they teach me the things of today.”

… nomina nuda tenemus.